Top Her Couture

Making the choice to get married is more than just saying I DO.  It requires sacrifices, sharing, compromise, etc.  It is a time in life when we must learn to let go of what we have been for what they are.  Many times people get married and forget why they did in the first place.  It is important to remind ourselves just how sacred marriage is and renew our vows often.  This could be formal with another ceremony or even a quiet romantic night where you both tell eachother the reason you are still here.  It could even be in the form of a letter.  Regardless of how you revisit these vows, make sure your significant other knows just how important your marriage is and abide in its loyalty, stabiliy, and love. "He hath remembered his covenant for ever, the word he commanded to a thousand generations."  Psalm 105:8 "Where you go, I will go, and where you lodge, I will lodge. Your people shall be my people, and your God, my God."  Ruth 1:1...

"Love never fails."  Many times we want things to change but take no time or initiative to get the ball rolling.  Love is rarely ever easy.  It has its ups and downs.  It is never black or white.  Today write down the areas you are working on.  you can do it in a list form or write an endearing letter to someone telling them what you are trying to change in your relationships and yourself.  This holds you responsible and accountable with thses choices.  Look at this list once a day or once a week to remind you of the path you are taking.  Be confident and courageous as God journeys with you! 1 Corinthians 13:8

"Delight yourself in the Lord; and He will give you the desires of your heart."  Relationships are all about letting go of our pride, our ego, and pretty much a lot of ourselves.  It is not always about what we want or how someone is fulfilling our dreams.  God has great intentions for us.  This is not to say we should not have goals or set plans; it just means that when something does not work out, we should look at it as an experiment and know He has our best intentions.  Today, is a day we find out not what we want but what our loved ones would like to obtain or are trying to obtain.  Pray often for their dreams and help them meet their goal at whatever level you possibly can.  Be their extra push towards being a better them! Psalm 37:4

"If two of you agree on earth about anything that they may ask, it shall be done for them by My Father."  We live in a busy world of hustle and bustle.  Most of us grew up thinking the busier you are and the more you have, the happier you should be.  The truth is most of those people are some of the most unhappy and bitter people.  The most important things in life is not things but the relationships we build.  It is important to MAKE the time in your life.  Spend time in a prayer group, pray with your spouse being able to let God help you with your disagreements, trials, and tribulations.  If no one is willing or ready, then make time to pray by yourself.  It is time to develop yourself and your relationships through God and with God. "But unto thee have I cried, O LORD, and in the morning shall my prayer prevent thee."  Psalm 88:13 Matthew 18:19

"Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path."  Psalm 119:105 Love is not just saying or doing it also applying.  It is about making a choice to instill God's word in your life daily by reading the bible, a devotional book, or other resources to build atop God's rock.  Today, lay the first brick to a better, stronger, more loving you by applying these resources to your everyday life.

"Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed."  God never intended us to figure everything out on our own.  It is important to build trusting and loyal relationships even outside of an intimate one.  We must seek cousel at all times through Christ and through these relationships.  Find one person in your life whom you are most comfortable with.  Someone who knows how to put bias a side.  It is important not to go to someone because you know they will side with you.  Some times the answers we need are the ones we do not want to hear.  During this process pray to God for his guidance in your decisions and if a friend or family member is not a choice to go to; begin looking into professional couselors. Proverbs 15:22

"[Love] does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth."  1 Corinthians 13:6 Whenever we harbor resentment, anger, animosity, hate, frustration, etc., it makes it harder for us to want to see the good in people.  We all are fighting some sort of battle.  Each situation affects us differently and sometimes more drastically than another.  Today, compliment a loved one on a recent act of good character.  Perhaps they resisted a temptation or did not react the same way they usually do.  Reinforce the positive changes!

"If two lie down together they keep warm, but how can one be warm alone?"  Ecclesiastes 4:11 We may not have exact plans for life as we are not in control but we have some idea the steps we would like to go.  Recognize that your spouse [Mr/s. Right] is integral to your future success. Let them know today that you desire to include them in your upcoming decisions, and that you need their perspective and counsel. Open the door and invite them into your life more and more.  If you have ignored their input in the past, admit your oversight and ask them to forgive you. 

"The husband must fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her husband."  1 Corinthians 7:3 Taking vows into marriage is more than just saying "I DO".  It requires a sense of vulnerability, giving, and unconditional thinking from both parties.  It is about getting over yourself.  Today, we make intimacy enjoyable for our spouse and ourselves by initiating the act.  Use things that you know entice them. . .candles, flowers, lingerie, food, etc.  Today, give in to their needs of intimacy.

A man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh. —Genesis 2:24 God has designed each and every one of us to be able to share our life with another.  He has designed us to need love in one way or another.  He has taken the best parts of himself and instilled them within our mind, body, and soul.  Love is simple and even more simple when you let it happen.  So many people today force themselves to not want or desire or love due to its vulnerable state.  This leaves so many of us not wanting to sleep in the beds we have made.  We walk out when they need us most.  It is fear that drives this flight mechanism and can only be conquered with courage.  Today, be brave and admit our weakness of running away.  Allow God to help you fight for the most important people in your life.  Make them your top priority!  It is never too late to fight for the ones you love. . .

"Father, keep them in Your name, the name which You have given Me, that they may be one even as We are."  John 17:11 There are many times in life when it comes to relationships we look at them for the answers of why it did not work.  He did not do this.  She did not do that.  What we seldom do is take time to change what we did.  It is hard for us to look in the mirror at our flaws & mistakes and take responsibility for them.  Today, we look at the parts of ourselves that are hindering our most dear relationships.  Take time to pray and let God work through you and the other person.  Let God help you reveal these weaknesses only to help you be a stronger, more loving individual. "Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God [is] one LORD. . ."  Deuteronomy 6:4

Loving someone with no thought of self takes a lot of courage, sacrifice, time, and letting go of what society says we should do.  In fact, being motivated by love is a rare feat indeed.  Much of society is motivated by fame, money, sex, etc.  Today is the day we rise to love and encourage it to take over our lives.  It is a day when we pray for those we love by name and no matter how hard it is to say "I love you"; we say it with the utmost care and respect.  Ask God to fulfill their needs as you stand by them unconditionally.  Thank God for the oppurtunity to love and do it as a freedom no one can ever take away. "And if it seem evil unto you to serve the Lord, choose you this day whom ye will serve; whether the gods which your father served that [were] on the other side of the flood, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land ye dwell: but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord."  Joshua 24:15 "Render service with a good attitude, ...

"He laid down His life for us. We should also lay down our lives for our brothers."  1 John 3:16 The world is missing a lot of sacrifice and compassion.  It seems so many run around- ME, ME, ME, I, I, I .  This even comes to play when people are in relationships.  It seems it is not "what can I bring to the table to better them and our relationship" it is more "what am I getting from them and this relationship".  Letting go of ego and pride can be hard, but one cannot truely live without love.  Today, make a sacrifice in the name of love.  It can be big or small.  Find a place in your loved one's life where they need you and give up whatever may be blocking you from being there.

"Guard my soul and deliver me; do not let me be ashamed, for I take refuge in You."  Psalm 25:20 Lets face it-we all have expectation.  Some of them higher than others and being human, we naturally image things happening a certain way. . .our way!  This is unrealistic in every sense.  It is okay to want, have faith, and hope, but some things we ask of others cannot be fulfuilled exactly how we think it should be.  Today, it is about finding understanding in how our loved ones meet our expectations.  Perhaps they excel in one area more than another.  Try not to sweat the small stuff and reinsure them of your unconditional love.

"When you judge another, you condemn yourself, since you, the judge, do the same things."  The most important part of being respons ible is responding.  This said, communication is key.  So many times we allow our pride to take over and pretend that we have done nothing wrong.  We hide our imperfections and qwerks hoping others will not see what a mess we are or see the mess we have caused.  We end up lying to the people we love the most as well as ourselves.  Today, humble your flaws by forgiving yourself, asking God for forgiveness, and asking those whom you have done wrong to for forgiveness.  Know that their reactions may not be pleasant or what you expect.  Do not get defensive or lash back at them.  This is the time to set yourself free from your mistakes and let those you love realize you are ready to start on a new path of responsibility and accountability. "But let every man prove his own work, and then shall he have re...

"What I have forgiven, if I have forgiven anything, I did it for your sakes in the presence of Christ."  2 Corinthians 2:10 We often keep ourselves imprisoned by not forgiving and holding on to animosity, resentment, bitterness, and the anger that comes with it.  Just is love is a choice, so it forgiveness.  Carrying around the shoulda, coulda, woulda's of life can be tiring.  Today, make the choice to forgive those who have hurt or wronged you.  Set them and yourself free from the chains of unforgiveness. "Then said Jesus, Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do.  And they parted his raiment, and cast lots."  Luke 23:34

"The world is passing away, and also its lusts; but the one who does the will of God lives forever."  1 John 2:17 Lust and love can be two of the strongest elements in life constantly in tug-o-war.  There are going to be times where one or the other takes over and the temptations of lust are going to be hard to defeat.  Being able to acknowledge when lust is present is going to be a very important part of overcoming it.  By asking questions like "Is this best for them or for me?", Is this going to hurt them?", or "Am I putting conditions on this situation?"  Decide now to open your heart to God and alleviate lust in the back bedroom.  Single out every lie you've swallowed in pursuing forbidden pleasure and reject it.  Destroy what keeps you away from God and love. "As free, and not using your liberty for a cloke of maliciousness, but as the servants of God."  1 Peter 2:16

"[Love] always protects."  1 Corinthians 13:7 Today, society relays through different media how when something is not going how we want it to or to our liking, that moving on to the next best thing is okay.  This may be what feeds the ever rising divorce rates.  Very few people, couples, or general relationships are willing to protect what they started.  We are all usually looking for the easy button.  Being able to stand for the heart and soul of not just yourself but of another takes a lot of work, strength, and selfless acts; but is well worth the outcome.  Focus on taking out any addictions, influences, etc. that are hindering your relationship(s).  Whatever is stealing your heart and affection away from those you love or love you, should be nipped in the butt.  Make sacrifices!!!! "If thou return to the Almighty, thou shalt be built up, thou shalt put away iniquity far from thy tabernacles."  Job 22:23

"I will betroth you to Me in faithfulness. Then you will know the Lord."  Love is a choice, not a feeling.  It is an initiated action, not a knee-jerk reaction.  So many times we throw our hands up and walk away even when we still love some one when they are not willing to accept our love.  Love is stronger than this and requires more effort.  Today, regardless of whether someone is will to accept your love or not, let them know you love them even if they do not return the love. Hosea 2:20

"The Lord will continually guide you, and satisfy your desire."  Taking time out of the day, even five minutes, to grow your relationship with God is important.  It is the most important relationship to build and keep.  Whether it is reading the bible, taking a religion class, going to adoration, taking a quiet hike, etc., be intentional.  Read a gospel, say a prayer, and continue to learn.  God is love. . .be satisified within Him and he will forever be in us as us. "Thou openest thine hand, and satisfied the desire of every living thing."  Psalm 145:16 Isaiah 58:11